Saturday, July 25, 2009

Mu Unfortunate Return (The project I wish I didn't have to do)

This blog still exists!!!

As I mentioned back in May I got a new job where I don't have the opportunity to cross stitch all day. Some days I am lucky to get a lunch, truth be told.

The good news is the new job is going great. I am busy but at least I'm not bored. Here at home things have been good (and busy) too. Windy's boys stay with us a few nights a week now that we have their room painted and they have beds. It's summer so there are tons of things for families to do that are being put on by the city such as game show nights on wednesdays and movies in the park on saturdays. And I have been devoting a lot of time to my other hobby: playing guitar/singing/songwriting. Trying to get some gigs for the summer, etc.

The best part was that Windy and I were expecting another child. A boy. She has two but, biologically speaking (cause I love those boyos), I don't have any. I only have girls. She even let me totally geek out on the name: Logan Xavier. Yes, I was into all the "X" books growing up: -Men, -Factor, -Force, even Weapon-.

Unfortunately on Monday, July 6th I woke up at about one or two in the morning to the sound of Windy screaming. She had gone in to labor early. Too early. Logan did not make it. It has been a rough couple of weeks to say the least. We had literally just told our other kids they were going to have a little brother so we had to break the news to all of them.

All of my kids have birth announcements and Logan was not going to be any different. At the memorial service we wrote messages on balloons and sent them off. I included some of the lyrics from "99 Red Balloons" to the announcement and most of the balloons we used at the service were red. I live and grew up in Sacramento and Kevin Seconds has always been a hero of mine, musically speaking. I know 7 Seconds did not write that song but I have heard them perform it so many times and Kevin plays it solo/acoustic once in a while. To me the song sounds like surviving the end of the world and honestly that is a perfect explination of how this whole experience has felt. So the song seemed fitting.

Stitching has been very cathartic during this time. Sometimes I would cry so much I couldn't see the wholes in my cloth or my hands were shaking so bad. But it helped. It took my mind off things. It gave me an outlet. It helped me accept. So in the comments, how has crafting helped you? You don't have to talk about the situation you went through if you don't want but what did you craft? Why? What did you do with the project from such an experience and how did crafting help you through?

I missed you all but I wish I was not "back" yet. I wish there had not been a need for this project. But there was so I would like to share it with you.